


My Sunset

by TheAwkwardLadyJay



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up and Make Up, Fluff, Forgiveness, M/M, Post-Break Up, sunset, the sunshine project
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-08
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-19 21:51:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14881872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAwkwardLadyJay/pseuds/TheAwkwardLadyJay
Summary: “Even now, you come to me for- for what? To ask for forgiveness? To rub in that I was nothing to you?” He scoffed and sat up, his eyes still firmly shut. If for no other reason than to block out the sight of Mark. “You come to me and you still can’t say anything. Do you expect me to fix it? Because it’s well past that, Mark. It’s over.”Mark broke Jack's heart when he ran away. But he's ready to fix his mistakes.





	My Sunset

**Author's Note:**

> This is for the first week of The Sunshine Project. The prompt is Sunset.

Jack let out a gentle breath. He concentrated on his surroundings, the soft grass under his hands, the cool breeze against his cheeks. He kept his eyes closed and simply enjoyed the moment. There was no reason to remember why he had come here. There was only him and the sunset.

A quiet rustling behind him made him aware of another’s presence. His eyebrows furrowed but he refused to open his eyes. He knew who was here. “Go away, Mark. You already made your stance very clear.”

His only reply was more rustling and the sound of someone sitting down. His eyebrows drew closer together. “What part of go away do you not understand?” He growled, fingers digging into the grass.

A moment of silence passed between them before Mark spoke. His voice was hoarse and it cracked several times. It made Jack wince slightly but he still didn’t open his eyes. “Please, Jack. Give me one more chance. I promise I’ll do better.”

Jack had to force himself to stay still. He wanted to get up and run. Run as far away from the man beside him as he possibly could. But he couldn’t give Mark that satisfaction. He couldn’t admit that he was just as scared as Mark was. “You had your chance and you ran.” He spat instead.

Mark was silent beside him. He couldn’t deny it, they both knew it. Jack even had several text messages to prove his point. Tears filled his eyes at the painful memory of that conversation, one that Mark couldn’t even bother to have in person. He squeezed his eyes shut tighter until he felt the wetness recede. “You left me standing outside your apartment with no answers and barely even a goodbye.” He continued, his voice cold and emotionless. “You couldn’t even give me a proper reason, Mark! Was that all I was to you? Just somebody to pass the time with until you got bored? Did you really feel so bad for using me that you couldn’t even lie about it?!”

He could hear Mark breathing now, deep, shaky breaths. He scoffed, “Even now, you come to me for- for what? To ask for forgiveness? To rub in that I was nothing to you?” He scoffed and sat up, his eyes still firmly shut. If for no other reason than to block out the sight of Mark. “You come to me and you still can’t say anything. Do you expect me to fix it? Because it’s well past that, Mark. It’s over.” Another silence fell, only broken by their heavy breathing, Jack’s fast and angry and Mark’s slow and broken.

“I di-“ Mark started but his voice broke, a choked sound escaping him. He cleared his throat and tried again, “I didn’t use you.” His voice was so small, so sad. Jack’s heart wilted a little. “I love you, Jack. I really, honestly do. I just... I’m not- Will you open your eyes, please? I want to have a conversation with you, like I should have before.” Jack didn’t respond. “Please, Jack.” Mark’s voice wavered dangerously.

An ounce of self-hatred went through Jack as he opened his eyes and turned to the man that broke his heart. He bit his tongue to keep himself from crying. Mark looked exactly as he remembered. Soft, black hair falling in unruly waves over his forehead. Gentle, brown eyes that could put a puppy to shame. A smile that could light the world with just one look. Muscles that rivaled a god’s. But his hair was a mess, knots and snarls scattered throughout. His eyes were full of tears and flicked from object to object, never focusing on anything for too long. He avoided looking at Jack completely. His smile, usually so full of life, was sad and barely even there. He was tense, despite his relaxed position, leaning back against his hands with his ankles crossed in front of him. He brightened slightly when his eyes met Jack’s. But he quickly returned to being somber. “Thank you. I know I hurt you and I’m sorry. That was never my intention. But I got scared. You were so ready to take the next step and move in together and I wanted to be. Gosh, I wanted to be, Jack. But I wasn’t. And that terrified me. So I ran. I thought that if I left, you would be able to find someone who could actually give you what you wanted when you wanted it.” He looked away, his tears finally streaming down his cheeks, “I didn’t realize how much it would suck to live without you. Because it does. Every day, I wake up and you’re not there and it hurts. And I know it’s all my fault. I know that. But I just... I need to know. Would you ever take me back, given the chance? Or did I really wreck everything beyond the point of fixing it?”

Jack stared at him for a few minutes, his face expressionless. He didn’t say anything, just watched Mark. And thought. He had imagined this scenario so many times in his head. Mark crawling back to him, begging for forgiveness, pleading that Jack take him back. In his imagination, it always felt so good to hear and see Mark like that. But now that it was right in front of him, he just felt empty.

Mark watched him hopefully.

Jack could see the hope slowly dying with every second of his silence. He let out a sigh. “I wish you had just told me that instead of breaking up with me.” He sounded tired, even to his own ears, “I never would have pushed you to move in with me. That was just a suggestion, something we could work towards if you wanted. It was never an end goal. I’m sorry that I made it sound like one.” Mark looked ashamed. He opened his mouth to say something but Jack raised a hand to silence him. “I wish I could say yes to your question. I loved you, Mark. I still do, as much as it hurts. But I can’t be in a relationship that could end at any moment. I can’t afford to know that if you get scared again, it’s over. This one time has been hard enough to deal with. I don’t need to go through this again, not with you.” Mark nodded sadly. Jack could tell he had been expecting that answer.

“What if...” he started then paused, thinking over his words before he looked up at Jack. There was a new determination in his eyes. “What if I promised to talk to you whenever I get scared?”

Jack shook his head. “Mark, I can’t-“

“I need you, Jack!” Mark interrupted, his voice desperate, “You are the only person I have ever felt this way about! I’ve thought about my mistake ever since I made it and it has been killing me. I will do anything to make it right, Jack. You just need to give me the chance to do that.” He let out a slow breath, running a hand through his hair. “I know it’s a lot to ask. But I’m not asking you to forgive me. I couldn’t possibly expect that from you. I’m just asking you to start things over with me.”

Jack didn’t move. His thoughts stumbled over each other like drunk men on a boat. He had honestly thought that Mark was going to be the man he married. And then they broke up and that dream had dissipated. But now he had the chance to get it back. But was it really worth the risk of another broken heart? He let out a sigh and dragged a hand down his face. He already knew the answer, though, didn’t he? He had always followed his heart over his mind and this time was no different. “You are lucky I love you.” He mumbled.

Mark stared at him, eyes wide with hope, “You mean...”

Jack nodded, “Yes, dammit. I’ll give you one more chance. But if you do this again, I’m done. No amount of groveling will change my mind, got it?” 

Mark’s face split into the biggest grin Jack had ever seen. “Really? You really…” More tears flooded from his eyes and he jumped onto Jack, tackling him to the ground. Kisses were peppered all over Jack’s face, “You won’t regret this. I promise you, Jack. I’m going to make you the happiest man in the world.”

Jack couldn’t help but laugh as Mark continued to press kisses to any part of him he could reach. He gently pushed him back, looking over his wet cheeks and beaming smile. “Gosh, I missed you.” He pulled Mark back down and hugged him, burying his nose in his hair and finally letting the tears he had been holding back trickle down his cheeks. “But I need you to know that I can’t forget this, Mark.”

He felt the man tense against him. He idly began to rub gentle circles into his back, “I’ll forgive you but this goes to deep to just forget. I need you to promise me that you’ll tell me if I push too hard or if you get nervous. I can’t lose you again, not like this. So promise me, Mark. Promise me you will talk to me.”

Mark rested his chin on Jack’s chest and met his eyes. For a moment, his gaze was uncertain. But his usual determination quickly replaced it. “I promise. I will do everything in my power to make this work. I will never forget how important it is to talk to you and tell you everything I’m thinking. I want this to work, Jack, because you are my sunset. You are rare and beautiful and worth risking everything for and I am willing to sit and wait for however long it takes for you to forgive me. So I promise I will talk to you before things get to this point again.”

A feeling of peace filled Jack with those words. He held Mark a little closer to himself and reveled in the feeling of rightness. This was who he was meant to be with. This silly, beautiful man in his arms was exactly where he was meant to be. “I’m glad.” He let a small silence drift between them, this one more comfortable than the others that had filled the evening. “Do you want to go somewhere else?”

Mark nuzzled into his chest and mumbled, “No. I like it here. It’s comfy.”

Jack rolled his eyes but he couldn’t hide his smile. “You’re a dork.”

“But you love me.”

Jack’s smile slipped into something more content, “Yeah, I do.”

They laid there for a while longer, content and happy with each other. The sunset washed over them and Jack watched it slowly disappear over the horizon. He kissed the top of Mark’s head gently and held him a little bit tighter. He was ready to take on the trials this new relationship would bring. But he knew as long as Mark was there with him, they could overcome anything.

**Author's Note:**

> Liked this? There's loads more like it over at my tumblr, theawkwardladyjay.tumblr.com. Feel free to just hang out, chat with me, or request a story.


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